A few months ago, a friend of mine wrote an interesting post at Little Piece of Pie about how few photographs there are of her, since becoming a mum. It struck a chord because there is most definitely an absence of me in the family albums. I tend to be the one behind the camera, taking endless snaps of my children doing silly and adorable things. I also tend to avoid the camera because, let's face it, there isn't a whole lot of maintenance going on here. Clothes get thrown on, hair scraped back, sunscreen smeared over my face. Mascara is a rarity. The lack of sleep is taking its toll. Anyway, I had this idea that I would post a photograph of myself, with or without the kids, each week, thus forcing me to step in front of the camera on a more regular basis. So we messed about with the camera this afternoon and took a few photos... and, oh my god, I look so tired and ragged: is this really a good idea?!
But, this is me. This is the reality. I'm exhausted; I have hardly any time to myself. I'm no yummy mummy, that is for sure! But I'm not a martyr either; I'm nowhere near perfection. I'm just getting on with it, trying to do the best I can, and not screw it up too much. It is really hard work right now, and most the time, I look like crap. I wish it didn't matter to me, but it does. I'm hoping it's going to get a bit easier soon, and I'll find more balance in my life. We'll see. So here it is: me.